Whenever I heard the words ‘mixed feelings’, I always thought of the unforgettable incident that etched deeply into my brain…
I was extremely melancholic and down that day. After my strenuous badminton practice, Coach did not select me to be part of the school team even though I trained extremely hard last year. I was obviously superior to some of the selected candidates thus, I could not understand the reason why Coach chose them over me. Just thinking about how much effort I had put into training, makes my blood boil. After that unjust incident, some of my seniors tried to console me and said that Coach’s decision was inequitable to me.
Feeling so disappointed, a thought rose up to my mind. If I told my mother about this incident, I would still have a slight chance of getting in to the team.
After I reached home, I immediately informed my mother about this misfortune that has befallen me. My mum said that it was just plain bad omen but still, she called the teacher-in-charge of badminton on the following day and requested an explanation from them on why I was not selected for the team.
On the next training, Coach conducted a trial just for me. I was instructed to play with one of the secondary one student who was in the team. The match was soon over and I had beaten him with a one-sided victory. Elated, I was on cloud nine as I eventually got a place in the team. But unfortunately for him, he could not stay in the team anymore as I had replaced him.
Knowing that, tears rolled down his cheeks. Seeing that, my conscience felt like it had been pricked by a porcupine, stung a bee and shot by a machine gun. That gave me a whole lot of mixed feelings. To think I made one of my juniors cry, what kind of senior and what kind of role model am I? After that incident, my heart was filled with regret and I doubt it would ever go away. I wish the both of us would get in to the team next year.